I knelt and looked up to the sky
wished for it with all my lot
But unheeded was my desolated cry
The golden gift for me was meant not.
This is how longing hours did pass
wanting to be cherished every day
But nothing to fulfill this wish did last
So accepting fate, my back turned away.
The mundane wheels churned ahead
with little surprises in life's train,
Like one brought back from dead
The golden gift I saw again
Withing my reach it shimmered bold
One feet away, I stand transfixed
Luring me into its hold
but now I just cannot open it!
Perplexed by the emotional swell
because its not happiness that I feel
wondering why, into it I dwell...
Did the long wait make me believe
that it was never my keep
Did I accept my loss and bury my desired so deep
that now it wont suffice my own need
Or was it time that made me wiser
who taught me there is no gift
Or is it the fear of the unknown unfurled
that threatens to wash away all that I built.
Caught in this turmoil I find no refuge
unable to move, unable to decide
Best to remain in the limbo I deduce
Nothing imminent, so I retain control
from a distance I watch the surreal golden gift
Into its trance I do not drift
Into its trance I do not drift
And somehow being here lets me breathe.
